I figured that after 14 years of trying to figure out what to do with my life, I would revisit that question once again, this morning at 11AM with Reina.
Reina is one of those women that reads your energy and the energy of other people. I went to her office (after a month and a half wait), sat at a small table across from her and she took my hands in hers for about 2 minutes. To make a story short she told me I had two purposes in this life:
1. To get married and have a family. She told me that while many people take this path, this is my purpose, this is what I am meant to do. My heart and my soul were created to bring a family into this world and raise them. OK. Moving on, anyone can say that to a 34 year old women and they would be right 95% of the time.
2. My essence is to bring love and life to people through an artform. (this peaked my interest, i am pretty damn good at painting and drawing but i dont really enjoy it) My artform, my essence, my calling, my energy: dance. OK. hold up a minute, this caught my attention. This is exactly the reason I left on this journey 2 years ago, to explore my passion for dance. She continued to say that I will not make money at this initially because I need people to reach out to me. How do I do that? Through teaching or any other job where I can communicate with large numbers of people on a daily basis. The more I can reach out to the community and get them to trust me and know me, the more people I will have to extend my "gift" too.
Wah-lah. And that is how Reina became my reina. i have been doing it right all along. I guess I just needed someone to "ok" me. Teaching to the masses, now I have to start to introduce dance into that. Oh wait, but I just quit my teaching job (hmm, will revisit that in another post).
But Reina was not finished with me yet. She started with my purposes to butter me up, then she turned to the energy that was blocking me from success in both relationships and work.
Reina: Who was the man in your life 14 years ago?
Me: LP (for those of you who remember, he came from another country to be with me in college)
Reina: He is standing here next to me right now, staring at you. He is following you everywhere you go. He means you no harm but he loves you immensely and cannot forget you.
Me: Um, he is dead?
Reina: No, no, its just his energy.
Me: So do i have to call him and tell him to leave me alone?
Reina: (laugh) No, that is my job. Its important for you to know that you never had long, lasting, meaningful relationships because he always blocked your success with another man because he would not let you go. Once his energy is cleared, you can continue with your life purpose #1 (ok, she didn't exactly say that, but she suggested it by pointing to her left hand's ring finger over and over again - remember, there was still the language barrier)
Another wow for me. I used to think 3 months in a relationship is long based on my dating CV, but when I reflect back on it, being 34 years old and only having 3 month relationships?? not so intense afterall.
Great i thought.. time to move forward when she struck me with another one..
Reina: who was the woman in your life 14 years ago? She is a bad energy and does mean you harm. She is pulling your hair and pushing you around and preventing you from feeling comfortable staying in one place.. you want to move from her any chance you get and she is not letting you out of her grips
me: i dont know.. i had a roommate but she never meant to block or harm me..
Reina: think..
me: could be the girl LP broke up with to come be with me and then went back to and married
Reina: that could be it.. with the cleansing of both these spirits you will have open space to move forward. no more excuses to lose interest and move around and not take action.
(damn, who has she been talking to?)
Reina: Lastly, where are you?
me: Um, here?
Reina: (laugh) i know that... but your head is in the clouds and you are floating around.. put your damn feet on the floor, baby, its time you get centered. You cannot help anyone or bring your love and soul and energy to the world if you are not in this world. Trust me, you will have a lot of time up there one day, but for now, BE HERE! Center yourself. Get grounded. Head up, but feet on the floor! STOP LOSING INTEREST IN EVERYTHING YOU DO (She did actually say that more strongly so I think I have the right to put it in caps)
And that was the final commentary on my life. If you know me, you know its true.
What was great about her was the she didn't predict the future, she didn't tell me how to bring dance to this world (even though i begged her to tell me what to do.. lol) and she would not tell me what my path is. She only told me about my essence and my energy: to love through dance and have a family.
I think that was a pretty good gift to myself.
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